Tidbits / Wine Humor / FAQs: : LocalWineEvents.com : Wine, Food, Beer, Or Spirits

Tidbits: Humor, Knowledge, Facts & FAQs

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"If your doctor warns that you have to watch your drinking, find a bar with a mirror."
~~ John Mooney

"If you want to become a rich, pretentious snot – and who doesn't? – you should learn about wine."
~~ Dave Barry

"If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer."
~~ Clement Freud

"If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt."
~~ Dean Martin

"If you drink like a fish, don't drive. Swim."
~~ Joe E. Lewis

"If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?"
~~ Stephen Wright

"If I give up drinking, smoking, and fatty foods, I can add ten years to my life. Trouble is, I'll add it to the wrong end."
~~ P.J. O'Rourke

"If all the vine rows in Australia were laid end to end, they would reach nearly to the moon ... but how would we pick the grapes?"
~~ John Wilson

"I've taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has ever taken from me."
~~ Sir Winston Churchill

"I'm so holy that when I drink wine, it turns into water."
~~ Aga Kan III

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy."
~~ Tom Waits

"Wine is the reason I get up every afternoon."
~~ Anonymous

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